Depression Getaway

encouragement, information, inspiration and hope

‘Authentic Crying’ or A Really Good Cry

This entry is part 3 of 4 in the series Depression Waterworks

Authentic crying might be a new term for you, I know it was for me. But don't judge until you have read the rest of this post.


I remember distinctly several good cries I had that were unexpected. I will share one. It was three years after my father had died suddenly at the age of 59. I was at my cousin's wedding surrounded by family. It was a happy occasion. The master of ceremonies was my dad's best friend. Before he began he said something nice about my dad and how he would have loved to have been there for this special occasion. My tears began. I thought I could just wipe them away, but no, they would not stop. I quietly inched my way backwards out of the crowded room and went off to have a good, unexpected cry. The tears would not stop for long time. I was totally overwhelmed with grief as though my Dad had just died.

I was not in control of those tears. They were in control of me. But if they were there, I guess they had to come out right? Once I stopped, I stopped, I was finished crying and able to take part in the happy event once again.

Primal Works talks about 'authentic crying'. They are not talking about the opposite of real tears which would be fake crying. They are talking about real deep body heaving cries. The article infers that this kind of crying is the only kind that is really going to bring the healing needed.

"Authentic crying is a powerful, full-body event. As with any response to pain, it often involves vigorous body movements. This may include curling up, rocking, shaking, twitching, stretching, and writhing.

To those unfamiliar, it may seem like the crying will never end, but it always does. With proper non-judgmental support, crying will lead to an inner emotional movement towards balance and health. Healing is not always immediate, but will occur with time.

You can 'practice' authentic crying when you are crying alone, where no one can hear. As the feelings rise, really let the sound and movement happen. Let yourself be loud. Let the volume be in proportion to the feelings and pressure you are experiencing. If you can belt out a song when you're alone, you can belt out a cry."

What do you think of that statement? Do you agree? Do you think it is a little far-fetched? Would you like to give it a try? Personally I am more able to force myself to laugh than to force myself to cry. I seem to need a reason to cry, but I don't seem to need a reason to laugh. What about you?

This is our third day to talk about the benefits of crying. Clearly sadness is a huge part of depression. Many of us when we are at our worst, can hardly stop crying. If crying is so good for us, then maybe we should NOT stop crying until crying has done its work. Maybe crying is more of a good thing that we think.

We have one more day to chat about 'depression waterworks'. We are still talking about water, but this time, not necessarily tears….

WHAT ABOUT YOU? Are you convinced that crying might be good for you? Have you had a good cry today?

I am so glad you stopped by 'Depression Getaway' today. There is hope for depression.

Don't give up, I'm praying for you!

Wendy Love

authentic crying

Reposted from April 2010.

Series NavigationDepression Waterworks: How You Can Benefit from Tears.Water Depression as if it was a Garden: Water is Good for Depression


Depression Waterworks: How You Can Benefit from Tears.


Water Depression as if it was a Garden: Water is Good for Depression


  1. I can vouch for the benefits of authentic crying. Less than a year ago, I encountered a situation that affected me deeply. My response? Uncontrollable crying. It got so bad, I went to the hospital and asked to speak with the crisis nurse. I explained that I could not stop crying about something I could not change. Still crying, I told my story all over again to the Emerge doctor. She listened patiently, confirmed that I was in a difficult situation and agreed there was nothing I could do to change it. My crying ended and I left the hospital with sore eyes that looked like slits. I think it helped to put words to my to my heartbeak.  

  2. Oh my goodness that is quite a story! Thank you for sharing it. May others follow your example of being willing to reach out for help. I have had a similar experience and the emerge staff was also helpful. The great lesson here is in your last statement “I think it helped to put words to my heartbreak”. Again, thanks dear friend.

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