Depression Getaway

encouragement, information, inspiration and hope

“The Nicest Guy I Know”

I am attending one of the friendliest churches I have ever gone to. The picture above was not taken in my church but it could be! People are welcomed warmly and cheerfully and made to feel important and at home right away. I love that about my church.

Who doesn't like being greeted when you walk through any doors, whether that is at home, or in a store or restaurant, or maybe at work, and definitely at church.

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Crashing Gracefully: Is there a GROUPON for that?

Somehow the words 'crashing' and 'gracefully' don't really go together but this woman is ready to 'crash' into the water and she is doing it gracefully.

Now I don't think this little fellow landed quite so gracefully, do you?

Too often I will read a blog written by a mental health blogger to see "sorry I haven't written for awhile but I'm back now and hope to post regularly". I conclude that they haven't been doing well and couldn't manage to write. And then irregularly blogging will take place. Or I will read "I am crashing again. I hate this illness. I've been feeling well for so long I had convinced myself that maybe I was better and now this". Or I may discover the name of a mental health blog I have never seen before and I will eagerly google it and find that they have quit posting.

I know it well. That feeling of depression returning, that sinking feeling even if you are sitting down or lying down. My walking slows down. I start thinking negatively about the same things I was thinking positively about only days before. I don't want to see people. I wonder 'how long will it last this time?' I think and I hope that maybe I am just tired and a few days rest and I will be good as new which happens sometimes.

I wish there was something I could do to prevent myself from crashing right down to rock bottom. I wish there was a pill I could take or a coupon I could cash in for instant healing.

Wouldn't it be wonderful? A 'Groupon' for preventing a depressive episode? How would it read?

"SPECIAL! Offer good anytime, never expires. FREE! Come on over to our spa and     we will stick with you until we are all sure this depressive episode has not taken over. We will pamper you, make sure you are taking your meds, listen to you go on and on about your negative thoughts, give you a massage if you want, feed you three healthy meals a day, make sure you get plenty of rest and sleep and more."

Of course there is no such thing. But I found something almost as good from Chipur.

He wrote a great article awhile back titled "13 Things to IMMEDIATELY Consider When You're SPIRALING DOWNWARD (and scared)".

If you need some help right now, go there right away.

I am posting this for my blogging friends who are going through a rough time right now.

WHAT ABOUT YOU? How are you feeling today? Are you stable? Are you on your way up or on your way down? Do you need help?

I am so glad you stopped by Depression Getaway today. There is hope for depression. Don't give up, I am praying for you right now.

Dear God,

You know what my reading friends are going through. You know what they need. Please help them today. Amen.

Wendy Love

 

Working with your Therapist: It takes Two!

Wow! These guys seem to have a great technique for one of the most difficult races of all time, the three-legged race.

Now this would be more typical, two trying to work together but pulling each other down. Maybe they had communication problems.

One time a few years ago, as I returned for my three month visit with my psychiatrist, I sat discouraged, in her office as she reviewed my file to get up to speed on my situation. She said "last time we were together you said you were managing".

"Yes, I guess that is true" I replied "but all I do is manage. My full time job is managing this illness. It takes up all of my life to do just that." I explained how I attempted to walk every day, eat healthy and stay away from people and situations that were negative for me. I told her that to a certain extent that was helping and yet I was still depressed most of the time.

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Therapy: One Size does NOT Fit All!

 

One of the great things about therapy, if it is working for you, is that once a week, or once a month you know you are going to spend time with someone whose only purpose for one hour is to listen to you and focus on you. That is a luxury. And during that time between sessions, if something comes up either in your circumstances or your symptoms, you know you will have an upcoming opportunity to discuss it with someone you trust.

The counsellors that were the most helpful for me were the ones who already knew me and my situation. My family doctor and my sister knew me the best and I trusted their judgement. I did not trust my own judgement. 

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Do I Need Therapy?

The first time I went to a therapist I didn't give it much thought ahead of time. I was desperate. Experiencing an unwanted and unexpected divorce, my life was falling apart and so was I. I was questioning everything I ever did and wondering what happened to lead me to this confusing place. I just needed to be in a room with someone compassionate who would listen to my sorrows, over and over and over. I wasn't even depressed – yet. And so a lot of thought didn't go into this choice. Gratefully, the good Lord gave me a kind and gentle therapist who had probably listened to many other women cry their way through divorce and knew more about such things than I did. It was comforting.

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Therapy: HELPFUL or HARMFUL?

Recently I decided to try a new therapist. I had hit a particularly low period which was lasting too long. I was desperate. Feeling depressed, vulnerable and needy, off I trotted to a stranger's office. I figured there was no way I could feel worse than I was already feeling, and maybe, just maybe a new therapist might have some fresh insights. It turned out to be a poor choice. We often make poor choices when we are feeling our worst.

Confession: I am a skeptic when it comes to any kind of therapy. There are few people who I will confide in, few people I trust. I would normally rather suffer alone than suffer at the hands of an ineffective therapist.

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Five Lessons from my Mother’s Flower Arrangements

My mother looked a lot like Betty White.

Last time I wrote about my mother's flower arrangements. I can still picture her doing that. I loved watching her use her hands, I can see it like it was yesterday. Whether she was straightening my shirt to make me look better, rearranging the books on a shelf to make them look pretty, using a paint brush to create a beautiful painting or just patting my hand, my mother's hands were magic to me. This picture is not actually my own mother, but she was pretty like Betty White and she did work in a florist shop for awhile, so it makes me think of her.

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My Misery Loves Flowers for Company

Do you like my flowers? I grew up in a house with lots of flowers. My mother had beautiful gardens and during the growing season, there were usually fresh flower arrangements around the house. Even during the rest of the year she would often buy flowers or my dad would bring some home for her.

She took great joy in these flowers. To start with she would cut a bit off of each tip of each stem to 'freshen it up and make it easier for the stems to drink water'. Then she would change that water every day.

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Why Does Misery Love Company?

 

"If you're going to be like that then go to your room until you can put a smile on your face."

I can still hear my mother or father speaking to me that way in polite but firm tones. We were not permitted to be publicly miserable in my family. Seriously, it was considered poor taste, bad manners.

The result was a happy, although phony household. That wasn't all bad. It's easier to grow up without anger than with anger, and for that I am thankful. 

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The Secret to Managing Food Cravings: Part Two

frozen-grapes

Aren't those grapes pretty and frosty? Yes, that is a picture of frozen grapes! If you haven't tried them yet you are in for a wonderful sweet surprise.

Frozen grapes are so sweet they can easily substitute for candy.

Confession! I am not handling my food cravings well at all right now. I did pretty well for about two weeks, which seems to be my max but then it only takes one sweet, usually ice cream and then I am off and running for sweets and bread! Eventually I get disgusted with myself, which usually takes a week and I try again to stay away from the culprits! Kind of like my bipolar mood swing, it's a vicious cycle of on and off sweets, but I still think it is better than to just indulge, indulge, indulge without any break which leads to fat!

Fat is definitely NOT a good depression getaway. 

Besides sugar and bread don't make me feel better. Well, not totally true. When I put it in my mouth it feels great but I always want more and more and more and by the time I am satisfied I feel rotten.

So this a reminder to me as well as you.

I am sharing some secrets about managing food cravings. Last time I told you that when I give up sweets and bread I don't crave them anymore.

This time I'm going to share some ideas for substituting for those poor carbs.

Any fruit can be a great substitute for refined sugar, especially for candy. Fruit is full of sugar and not the kind that causes cravings! Frozen grapes are the absolute sweetest.

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